Upon looking at Vida Guerra throughout this Spanish edition of Maxim, it’s quite obvious the people behind this photoshoot were obviously ass men.  Thanks to this issue, I’m able to blindly recall every contour and airbrushed area — I even gave it a name: Spankita. 

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Vida Guerra. Celebrity Catwalk for Charity.  Okay, now that we have that all out of the way, let’s get past the superficial: past the ugly face, hair, and makeup, and take a good look at those breasts.  Can anyone say Wonder Bra?  This girl made sure she was going to take a good damn picture.  She lathered those lightly tanned babies up in oil and squeezed into that tight little dress (let’s ignore the fact she’s kinda spilling out of it) and said “Look at me world!  Men for ages to come will be drooling over my rack…at least on the internet!” And she was right…at least for the next five minutes.

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I can’t imagine a girl who’s built like Vida Guerra being any good at sports, yet here she is playing baseball for charity.  This is dumb.  No one cares if this chick plays baseball.  Why don’t they put her in a wet T-Shirt contest for charity.  You want to earn money?  Throw Jessica Simpson, Jessica Biel, and a few Victoria Secret models in there, it will be the biggest fund raiser of all time.

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• Abigail Clancy has the perfect breasts
• Lindsay Lohan isn’t the only who can rock spandex
• Speaking of Lindsay, who is she banging now
• Brad Pitt’s kid is living large

• Amy Winehouse is on something
• Lookie Hea!  Hot chick in a bikini
• Odette is all smiles
• Kate Moss needs help in the bathroom