Now you may think Victoria Silvstedt is some airhead, ditzy model. And I’d agree with you.

But you have to admit, the chick knows exactly how to entertain us. Barely restrain those girls in a bikini top, and let’s be honest, we’re all hooked.

Standing at attention and everything.

Maybe I’ve been spoiled by Kim Kardashian, but the ass is nothing much to look at, but Victoria invested her money wisely, I think, by pumping those tits full of silicone.

Coco’s the only chick I know of who’s made the ass implants work.

Photos by FAME

Looking at Victoria Silvstedt (hell, let’s be honest: looking at Victoria Silvstedt’s RACK) makes you want to drop to your knees and thank God for women. Or the Swedes.

I finally found out what Victoria does: she’s apparently a big model in Sweden. For the life of me, I can’t figure out why we don’t see more of her here, Stateside.

She’s just MADE to be one of Victoria’s Secret’s angels. Those tits beg for one of Victoria’s Secret’s lacy little bras. (And the legs aren’t bad, either.)

Can you imagine how mouth-watering they’d look in a push-up bra? Hell, I’m licking my lips at the thought.

Photos by FAME

Victoria Silvstedt is bringing her special touch to the beaches of St. Tropez: her T&A are on display here in this little dress.

Actually, for Victoria this is downright subtle. Yet, I’m sure the males on the beaches were glad they paid their money to visit a place like St. Tropez with tits and ass like this readily visible on the shores.

Hell, I’d find it worth the money. Who blames the dude who flew her out there (’cause I don’t believe for a second that this chick paid her own way)? ‘Cause you know that dude got to do a lot more than just look at that body.

Photos by FAME

Big tits: check. Hat: check. Tiny bikini bottom: check. All Victoria Silvstedt needs to complete the image is a damn Stetson.

Then she could lose the bikini bottom and ride all kinds of things into the blazing sunset.

And don’t get me wrong, these pictures are amazing, but why are the paparazzi following Victoria around? I went to her website. Here’s the first line in her biography:

This Swedish beauty can do just about anything you would expect a woman to be able to do. Nearly six feet tall, with platinum blonde hair and icy blue eyes, Victoria’s supermodel status and physical beauty is celebrated all over the world.

Anything you would expect a woman to be able to do… DAMN that has me thinking all kind of thoughts. Excuse me…

Photos by FAME

There’s something very hot about cover-ups. I mean, you can see all that skin, tits and ass fully covered only in a bikini.

Yet there’s an easy-to-see through layer of fabric. Tantalizing. Fun times.

Model Victoria Silvstedt obviously understands this idea. Why else would she go shopping in a bikini and cover-up?

Hey, don’t get me wrong: I sure as hell am not complaining. I’m merely expressing my appreciation with the observation that Victoria looks sexy as hell even with a cover-up over her bikini.

I’m sure every dude out there (and who sees these pictures) agrees with me.

Photos by FAME

I’m not sure anyone  gives a rat’s ass about Victoria Silvstedt’s hat, but hey, as long as she flashes those tits, I’ll look at whatever else she has, too.

Tits, ass, and long legs… talk about a winning combination. Just don’t look above the neck, ’cause then you have to ask the inevitable question: WHAT the hell happened to this chick’s lips?

Oh, we all know what happened. She got a little too happy with the injections. Here’s a tip, V: injections should always go to the TITS, not the lips, honey.

We’ll all appreciate nice big golden globes a lot more than Donald Duck lips.

Photos by Bauer-Griffin

What the hell does Victoria Silvstedt do, exactly?

Apparently she’s a Swedish model, actress, and television personality. (Thank you, Wikipedia)

Don’t be too impressed, though. If you stop and think about it, The Hills’ Heidi Montag could claim the same thing (she posed for Playboy, so that covers the modeling part, she got a bit part in the latest Adam Sandler movie Just Go With It, so technically she can call herself an actress, and being on The Hills makes her a television personality).

Well, I’m going to give Victoria the benefit of the doubt that she’s more talented than Heidi. Mostly because she’s awfully damn HOT. And, let’s face it, it’s not exactly difficult to be more talented than Heidi Montag.

So enjoy Victoria doing at least one thing well: soaking up some rays while looking hot.

Photos by Bauer-Griffin

Well, I’m posting these pictures because she has big tits, but that’s stating the obvious, isn’t it?

Now, if I look at pictures of Victoria Silvstedt, then I PREFER to see her in a bikini. (Naked wouldn’t be bad, either, but you can’t have everything.) However, I’m willing to appreciate Victoria in this little dress.

You can still see those big tits and long legs, so it’s enough for me. I’ll look at Victoria’s girls covered or uncovered, although less coverage is definitely better.

I don’t even know what the hell Victoria does besides pose for the paparazzi in bikinis and little dresses. Well, I guess that’s enough.

Photos by Bauer-Griffin