While domestic abuse isn’t selling at the moment, sex addiction may go soaring…that’s if Tom Cruise’s lawyer doesn’t get in the way.

Tom Cruise is ticked off because a t-shirt company is allegedly planning to use his image on a shmatah that will say “sex addict” on the front and “everything turns me on” on the back.

We’ve obtained a letter sent by Aaron Moss, Cruise’s lawyer, to Addictiontee.com, threatening to sue the pants off the t-shirt company if it goes forward with the product, calling it false advertising and consumer fraud.

For those wetting their panties over the thought of purchasing another witty tee to add to their extensive “I wear funny shirts to make up for my lack of in-person humor” wardrobe, there is a plan B.

A spokesman for the t-shirt company says the shirt is in production. And the company is acting none too scared, adding, “We’re going into production of a t-shirt inspired by Cruise’s attorney with the words ‘legal addict’ on the front and ‘I sue everybody’ on the back.”

It looks like life (and money) always finds a way.  Take that legal loophole!

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Kids are our future,  kids are important, and when you’re the seed of crazy man Tom Cruise and his love slave Katie Holmes, be expected to be one of the most publicized celebrity children.

The 2-year-old daughter of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes tops Forbes.com’s second annual list of “Hollywood’s 10 Hottest Tots.”

Forbes.com, which ranked celebrity children 5 years old and younger based on media attention and their parents’ popularity, said Suri — known for her stylish outfits and haircut — popped up in more news articles and blogs than her peers.

Of course, her popularity is fueled by the same curiosity an 86 year-old of your community’s neighbor hood watch lives off of.  Will she share the same destiny as her father, or will it be revealed that she was sent from another planet that was destroyed shortly after she was cryogenically frozen and ejected into outer space?  Stay tuned!

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Tom Cruise bestowed Friars Club with his presence to roast the Today Show show host Matt Lauer.  From what I make of it, wierdoes like him have the worse sense of intentional humor.

The superstar… launched into a slide show of PhotoShopped pics of him and Matt jet skiing, barbecuing and sitting together on the couch.

“When we can’t get together, we’ll talk on the phone two, three, four times a day and say, ‘Matt are you watching this?’ And he’ll say, ‘yeah.’ And we’ll sit there.”

“In front of all these people, I just want you to know I can’t believe I flew all the way out here… Now lose my number, you glib putz.”

For his performance, I’m willing to give him a point or two.  I mean, when dealing with public speaking, and a bunch of old gents, people will laugh at anything.  And what did Matt Lauer have to say about all of this?

In rebuttal to Tom’s roasting, after the Oscar nominee exited, Matt said, “Come on, Tom… Stay. We can get a booster seat!” And when he realized Tom wasn’t returning, he added, “Oh, guess his spaceship has to leave.”

Tom: 2.  Lauer: 100.  The Cruise fails yet to realize wherever he goes, he’s a walking punchline.

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• Abigail Clancy has the perfect breasts
• Lindsay Lohan isn’t the only who can rock spandex
• Speaking of Lindsay, who is she banging now
• Brad Pitt’s kid is living large

• Amy Winehouse is on something
• Lookie Hea!  Hot chick in a bikini
• Odette is all smiles
• Kate Moss needs help in the bathroom