You know whoever designed this dress is into all that kinky shit: belts, probably whips and chains, too.

This, of course, leads me to wonder if the reason former Pussycat Doll singer Nicole Scherzinger chose this dress is because she’s one of those naughty, kinky chicks.

Somebody needs to get Lewis Hamilton drunk and get him to spill that shit. Can you imagine THAT sex video? Hell, I might actually shell out a few bucks to see that one.

Maybe we’ll get some clues to Nicole’s sexual nature when we see her as a host on X-Factor this fall. Somehow, I doubt it: I bet Paula Abdul and her high-as-a-kite self will steal that show, along with the long-lasting bastard Simon Cowell.

But you never know.

Photos by FAME

Nicole Scherzinger shows us why SHE should be the new X Factor judge: she’s hot.

Really, who cares what the chick has to say? Let Simon Cowell rip those contestants a new asshole while Nicole soothes with flashes of her tits.

Paula can give contestants the weed to smoke and a decent singer can get a recording contract via LA Reid.

Hell, it works for me. Nicole’s got a much better rack than that British chick they first brought in to judge (Cheryl Cole).

Let the British invasion begin. I’d even sit through a Pussycat Doll reunion if Nicole wore sufficiently skimpy outfits.

Photos by FAME

Chery Cole- who moved from the British version of the X Factor to the US version of the X Factor only to get fired after a week or so- can probably vouch for me when I say: I bet Nicole Scherzinger is one Pussycat Doll with claws.

See, when Cheryl’s ass was dumped from the US version of the X Factor, Nicole (who had just been one of two hosts on the show) replaced her as a judge.

Now Nicole’s flaunting that rack (which, I must say, seems a bit, um, well, more sizable- hell, I’ll just say it: BIGGER) for all those tits are worth.

I’m sure she wants all of us here in the US to be like, Cheryl who? (And we will, because honestly, nobody over here knew who the hell she was anyway).

Photos by FAME

If you ever wondered why Nicole Scherzinger was a Pussycat Doll, one look at these pictures should make it clear.

Regardless of whether or not she screeches like a cat when she has the microphone, the chick is STACKED.

Hell, I’m not a fan of 70′s style at all, but those bell bottoms nicely accentuate all that’s above, from the hips to the ASS (check out some thumbnails).

And her golden globes are on display in that top.

I heard she’s supposed to be taking Cheryl Cole’s place as a judge on the US version of the X Factor. I think I’d rather see her warbling and shaking her ass up on stage, but maybe that’s part of what she’ll do.

Photos by FAME

You know, after a while of repeatedly seeing Nicole Scherzinger in tight black outfits with her breasts pushed up to her chin, I almost beg for something a little different.  A bikini, more raunchy poses, hell, I’d even enjoy seeing her in a bathtub filled with candy corn.  But it’s okay, at the end of the day we all need something to let off a little steam, and regardless Nicole can occassionally do the trick.  But I’ll always have room in my heart for that candy corn…

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I’m not nominated to be the world’s next best listener, but when Nicole Scherzinger opens her legs for the sake of a performance, I swear I can hear every leathery fiber stretch then scream in animated pleasure.  Too bad anything else I hear from her is garbled and inaudible.

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Remember the parties you were never invited to?  Remember when people would talk about how awesome that club was that you couldn’t get into?  Well that’s kind of like Nicole Scherzinger’s birthday party.  All the hot chicks you can imagine and you are nowhere in sight.  I think I just depressed myself.  OH Gad.

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Nicole Scherzinger looks like she’s at some kind of funeral here.  Some kind of sexy funeral!  I always think it’s funny when women wear a see through top that clearly shows their bras then other times they are self conscious to make sure that their bra straps aren’t showing.  This is why I will never understand women.  Well, that and the fact that they seem to always spray me with mace.  What’s up with that?

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