Dreamboat Kiefer Sutherland is single.

Kiefer Sutherland has finalized his divorce from his ex, Elizabeth, four years after filing papers.

A Los Angeles Superior Court judge granted the divorce on Friday.

The actor, 41 — who served a stint in jail for a DUI arrest last year — and his ex were together for nearly eight years before he called it quits, citing irreconcilable differences, in 2004.

This guy is the Lord of the Drunks.  I can’t wait to see him hammered on a date with some supermodel and the antics that will ensue.  I mean the dude took his pants down at a table surrounded with dudes.  What he’s going to do to a woman in public will probably be illegal in half the world.  Awesome.

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Kiefer Sutherland was released from jail over the weekend after serving time for his 18th DUI arrest.  OK, maybe it wasn’t 18, but anything more than one to me is too many.  In fact, if you can’t drink and be in motion, I suggest the bus.  Not only is it safer, but it provides people with entertainment.  Nothing is funnier than the drunk guy on the bus.  Just make sure you piss yourself at the end of your act.  That’s always a big laugh.

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Kiefer Sutherland, who pleaded no contest to DUI, has been sentenced to serve 48 days of jail in a minimum security prison with no chance of early release. According to Times Online,

He will serve his sentence at Glendale city jail, but under a county jail inmate programme because of problems with overcrowding, Mr Jeffries said. Early release will not be considered.

The jail, where Sutherland specifically requested he serve his sentence, is a minimum security facility with 48 cells, each of them measuring 3 metres by 2.5 metres. They come equipped with two beds, a toilet, washbasin and water fountain, but the actor will not be sharing his cell with anyone.

Two beds, one toilet, a shower, a water fountain, free food, and a break from the real world? Where do I sign up? That isn’t punishment, it’s a damn vacation. Now all he has to do is push the two beds together and he’s living large… for free.

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Kiefer Sutherland was pulled over on the suspicion of DUI when he made an illegal U-turn in West Hollywood at 1:35am. He allegedly proceeded to blow twice the legal limit of 0.08. According to TMZ,

This is the actor’s second DUI in the past five years — he was arrested in 2004. By California law, if he’s convicted, he must serve a mandatory minimum of five days in jail…

We’re told Sutherland was “cooperative and mellow” while he was in custody.

According to the L.A. Sheriff’s Dept. website, the actor is 5′10″ and weighs 150 lbs.

Of course Kiefer was “cooperative and mellow.” While we’re at it, lets compliment him for breathing, blinking, and not hitting a cop in the face. You may be thinking, “He could have killed an innocent child,” but that’s irrelevant. Children aren’t awake at 1:35am. The case should be thrown out right now. Kiefer said, “Can you PLEASE take me to the police station?” His good manners should the number one factor deciding whether or not Kiefer receives a five day rape party because things like Breathalyzers and illegal U-turns are flawed.

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