I call this picture: “Serious… Constipation.”

While filming his new movie about the assassination attempt on Hitler in Germany, Tom Cruise, has been facing criticism from the German people. Germans have been comparing Cruise to the Nazi propaganda minister Joseph Goebbels, calling Cruise’s Scientology a:

totalitarian organization.

Meanwhile Scientology fired back calling German Protestants:

irresponsible [and] wrongheaded

Who the hell uses the word wrongheaded? That is the problem with Scientology. Cruise and Scientologists wouldn’t be facing this criticism if they weren’t so damn weird about everything. All the Church had to do was make fun of the fact that Germans love David Hasselhoff and rest of the world would’ve been like, “Oohh Snap, they got you there Germany.”

Whattup Zenu!
Post by OverAdulthood: Humorrific News?!

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David Hasselhoff, while promoting his new single, “Jump in My Car,” fell asleep on British TV Sunday morning. After performing his single, during the TV break, Hasselhoff fell asleep in the back. According to the Daily Dish,

“‘GMTV’ producers dismiss speculation he was drunk. A spokesperson for the show says, “We do not believe he was drunk. There was no smell of alcohol.”

Hasselhoff explains, “I was really tired. I’ve been in Vancouver then Leeds, then Manchester then Croydon.

This story would have been much more entertaining if he fell asleep “on” TV. Regardless, does anyone have the video of his performance or know where to find it?

Other David Hasselhoff news:

•  David Hasselhoff is desperate

David Hasselhoff, who has a pending book release, recently admitted that is circumstances were different, he and Princess Diana would have shacked up. According to Female First,

The actor claims when the pair met at a charity event in London, Diana, who was married to Prince Charles at the time, joked to him: “You look much better with your clothes on” to which Hasselhoff replied: “Well Ma’am, so do you.”

I have the same problem as David. Every time a girl looks at me, she wants to sleep with me, even if it was by accident and it was my sister. (by the way, I love all cheesy David Hasselhoff photos, so if anyone knows of any funny ones, comment and let me know!)

[tag]David Hasselhoff[/tag] recently went to court to settle out his divorce to [tag]Pamela Bach[/tag]. The session at court was held in privacy, to protect the information being disclosed. In light of all the stirr-ups his wife had cause, I don’t think “Hassel the Hoff” wanted anyone watching him put his ho’ in order.

During the break the courtroom had taken, Hasselhoff started to sing in German in the hallway. If you’re going to blame your wife for having mental problems, singing in German during a court session won’t help. Then again, making German pop records won’t either. Neither will trying to enter the rap industry. Wait, which one is the crazy one?

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