Celebrity Gossip by Derek Hail » Brooke Hogan

Brooke Hogan Tries to Sound Edumacated

thebrokenfarted — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 11:00:49 +0000

Brooke Hogan wows the world on her myspace once again while flaunting just how disproportionate her brain mass is to her boobs with her take on why women shouldn’t be in the White House and voting:

“Notice how i said ‘I know IIIIII couldn’t do it cause I’d be pms-ing and freaking out all the time’ …Honestly I’d LOVE to meet a woman with NO emotional problems….but thats not the point…but its true. LOL.”

“I’M personally not up to date on the facts, so I don’t wanna make a stupid choice for our country. I WANT to vote but only when I know exactly whats going on. More ppl should think like that.”

Yes, Brooke. *pat pat* Let’s leave all the complicated stuff to the intellectuals and professionals. Now start jumping up and down for the man behind the camera as we douse you with a fire hose.

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Nick Hogan is a big boy

Derek Hail — Wed, 30 Jul 2008 11:09:55 +0000

Leave it to your sister to make things worse. Brooke Hogan just invited all the dudes in prison with Nick Hogan to kick his ass.

“I was worried about him, and his safety, and his well-being.” Little Nicky is out of solitary now that he’s 18, and in the general population, and apparently he’s eating better.

But Brooke says that he’s not exactly the most popular inmate in the Pinellas County Jail: “He’s been threatened. Thank God he’s big and he can hold his own.”

Oh Man, I give Nick a week before he gets ass raped. Nick is “big and can hold his own”? I’m sure there are a few dudes in that jail that are going to teach Nick the real definition of bieng “big”.

Brooke Hogan Apologizes For Lying About Hulk Hogan

Derek Hail — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 14:02:37 +0000

Brooke Hogan apologized for confirming false allegations that her father abused her mother. According to People,

“I did it under significant pressure from my mother,” Hogan, 20, tells PEOPLE in an exclusive statement. “It was only after I learned all the facts that I realized I made a big mistake in signing it.”

Hogan released the statement after a tabloid reported that she had signed a legal affidavit accusing her father, whose real name is Terry Bollea, of verbally and physically abusing wife Linda during their marriage.

The Hogan family is an absolute mess. The son drives drunk and accidentally kills people, Hulk Hogan allegedly beats women, Linda wants her money, and Brooke Hogan really is a man. Ok, well, maybe she isn’t a man, but has broader shoulders than me and she has those man hands.

Wanna see Brooke Hogan Naked?

Derek Hail — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 13:25:18 +0000

Brooke Hogan has been contacted by Playboy about appearing nude.

Brooke Hogan has been approached to pose nude for the famous men’s magazine, her publicist told the Daily News on Wednesday. And she didn’t say no.

The “Brooke Hogan Knows Best” star, 20, could use a boost for her stagnant singing career. Hogan’s 2006 album “Undiscovered” reportedly sold just 127,000 copies.

How many people really want to see this guy naked? Brooke’s arms are bigger than my thighs. She looks like she shotputs midgets on a daily basis. Seriously Hef, go after someone like Rachel Bilson or Marisa Miller, not this sloth with implants.