The NSFW version of the above is after the jump.

April 11th, 2005 a then-married Jessica Simpson slept with Bam Margera. Although the news was confirmed on Howard Stern on September 19th, a US online reporter probed Bam for more details.

“Once,” he said, when asked by an Us reporter how many times he and Simpson had been intimate. “It was when her parents were away and Nick was away. It’s not a secret.”

How is Simpson’s camp taking the news? “As a father, I want to go beat the crap out of people who say things like this,” Jessica’s dad/manager, Joe, tells Us. “It really hurts to hear people say things like this about my daughter.”

Still, some of Margera’s raunchiness may have rubbed off on the 26-year-old single star. During a recent interview in Allure magazine, the former virgin bride wore a rooster pendant and joked, “I don’t have a c–k at the moment, so I wear one around my neck.”

Wearing threads of white was once permitted for Jessica Simpson, but now she should be wearing a pearl necklace. Not the ones from the sea, but from semen.