Portia de Rossi Gets Married

All the dreams of men desiring the opportunity to point Portia de Rossi in the right direction have been smashed this weekend after word got out that she and her lover Ellen DeGeneres have gotten married.

In the biggest celebrity union since California legalized same-sex marriage, DeGeneres, 50, and de Rossi, 35, wed Saturday night in an intimate ceremony at their Beverly Hills home, People and Us Magazine reported.

As nice as that sounds, the only regrets that seem to be prominent is the fact Ellen DeGeneres couldn’t be one of those femmy-fem lesbians. Only then would watching their honeymoon sex tape be promising.