Heather Locklear Attempts an Owen Wilson!

“Remember the time when they hung on your chest instead of your knees? We remember.”

Reports have been coming in all day and it has finally been cleared up as to why paramedics rushed over to Heather Locklear’s place this past weekend. The former Melrose Place star’s psychiatrist called 911 after speaking with a very upset Locklear on Saturday night. Apparently, the psychiatrist felt Locklear might overdose on her prescription medicine, so instead of taking chances, the doctor called emergency. When the paramedics arrived, Locklear was fine.

I guess she didn’t have the stones to take it as far as Wilson; although a suicide attempt might garnish more attention than the past 3432 tv shows she was on. Oh, witty joke.. I guess you could say she has been with enough pilots to fly her own plane. Well? Huh? Ya get it? What? Not that funny? Well screw you! You try making suicide funny!! Bastards.

I got the deal: here