Eva Mendes is NOT Pregnant?

Eva Mendes is not pregnant, she’s enjoying dessert and pasta. While this news may be a little outdated, most of my speculation of whether or not she was pregnant was coming from random Eva Mendes pictures. Anyway, according to Fametastic,

But she’s now said she doubts she’ll ever have children or marry: “I don’t wanna have kids… I love the little suckers; they’re so cute but I love sleep so much and I worry about everything.”

“[And] I feel like the institution of marriage is a very archaic kinda thing. I don’t think it fits in my world today.”

And as for the bump: “I’m off season right now. I’m having the pasta, I’m having the dessert.”

Off season? She’s not a model or an athlete. She’s an actress. Does she even have a season? I mean, I’m off season too. Is this what we’re calling being fat, lazy, and having chocolate fingers? After all, fat people do fat people things. And, with regards to not fitting in her world, I’m pretty sure I’d fit just fine. My penis is two inches big and fits anywhere.

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