Lindsay Lohan Hits the Stripper Pole

Lindsay Lohan, in preparation of her new movie “I Know Who Killed Me,” has been taking lessons to learn how to dance on a stripper pole. However, after several bruises on her inner-thighs, she sent out a completely coherent email to her friends. According to Page Six, Lindsay wrote,

“They’re all whores, they’re all whores . . . xcept for some obviously!” Lohan wrote in the note, “So . . . 3 hours of pole dancing and bruised. everywhere . . . I mean we’re talkin’ like, UPPER AND INNER THIGH ACTION-bruised . . . like a walking black-and-blue mark.

“I mean really though, really, I didn’t know it was actually possible to have bruises in such areas of the body. Strippers dude, I tell you, I really respect the [c-word]s now. . . I’m not gonna lie to ya.”

Why would you call someone you have respect for a cunt? Is this a new term of endearment amongst late teens and early twenties women? All I know is, the last time I used the word cunt, I was smacked even though I desperately tried to explain myself. “Honey, I wasn’t talking about you. I was talking about your sister.” Sarcasm off.

Side Note: We can be sure Lindsay doesn’t look this sexy

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