Lindsay Lohan has excellent table manners and should start working on a high-class, table manners guide. Here are 5 ways to be as classy as Lindsay Lohan.
- Leave Table – You are at dinner to impress your guests. Make sure you leave the table every three minutes to powder your nose to insure you are fresh for your guests. Don’t worry, they won’t view this as rude because you are doing it for them, which is completely unselfish.
- Pick Teeth – If you have something caught in your teeth, use anything: finger, business card, fork, or penis, to pick it out because it is acceptable as long as you make a ridiculous face while doing it. People will think you were trying to be cute as opposed to being completely disgusting.
- Cover Face – After embarassing yourself and the people you are dining with, it is proper to cover your face in shame. Not only does this hide you from scrutiny, it also makes your fellow friends, whom you are dining with, more comfortable with being out to dinner with an animal.
- Unkempt Nails – Remember that they are just your nails. Chipped nail polish (most likely from picking teeth) is acceptable because your friends will know you are trying to keep them from being embarassed by removing whatever is embarassing from your teeth. The point is, to do everything for your friends or your guests.
- Prayer of Thanks – Not only should you thank who ever it is you pray to for your fortunate life and privelege to eat food, but you should also pray nobody had to witness you digging for gold in between your teeth while getting spit all over your hands, arms, and the table because that would be rude and not remembering the main rule of “do everything for your guests.”
Here are some pictures of the occasion where Lindsay shows off her excellent table manners.
[tags]Lindsay Lohan[/tags]
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{ 6 comments }
That is just gross. You would think that for being a celebrity she would know that people are constantly watching her and that she should probably do her part in keeping at least a SLIGHTLY good reputation. Ew….
i cant say a thing. good thing that she is notmy fav star..ew…!!she is more than mortals like me. i think ive got more table manners than her.ewwwwww….
It wouldnt be that hard to have more table manners than her considering she has none
not bad lindsay!!! keep up the goood work!!
How can you complain about table manners when you are American and you don’t have any(table manners) at all. Just to put at your place, do you know the difference between a fish and meat knife?
oh my god. Seriously you all need to just give her a break. Shes human just like the rest of you. So what if shes a celebrity?? NOBODY IS PERFECT. Nobody has perfect table manners. And don’t act like you never do anything like that because its not even true! And if you say you dont do anything like that then its a huge lie.
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